AA Grundi: An alternative review of 2014 in Worksop

Archduke Franz Ferdinand and his wife Sophie shortly before they were assassinated in Sarajevo.
Archduke Franz Ferdinand and his wife Sophie shortly before they were assassinated in Sarajevo.

It was the year of ISIS, an Ebola outbreak and the shooting down of an airliner over Ukraine.

Or if you prefer it, the year of selfie sticks, yet another iPhone and Benefits Street. How was 2014 for you? Of course in Worksop the pace of change moves much slower, with years and even decades blending into one.

But that’s not to say it wasn’t another eventful year with plenty to keep Grundi occupied. From outlandish suggestions that people would actually pay to spend the night in Worksop at a new hotel, to an ASBO being awarded to a Worksop Saddam Hussein look-alike - we were never bored.

We also had the ridiculous phenomenon of those softies over in Retford claiming they had been victim of a ‘tornado’ - after a storm which most in Worksop passed off as a stiff breeze.

In July, the Tour de France came as close as it’s ever likely to and one of the team coaches even ended up in Worksop.

Where no doubt the world’s top cyclists called in to pick up some tips from Worksop’s own two-wheeled stars on how to bomb down Bridge Street at full pelt on market day on a BMX, topless.

With it being the centenary of the First World War, we were also reminded that Worksop could very nearly have sparked the conflict when Archduke Franz Ferdinand turned up in town just months before his assassination.

Historians have yet to explain adequately what exactly he was doing here but the guy clearly liked taking risks.

I also had another opportunity to analyse exactly why Worksop folk are totally unable to walk down the street in a straight line.

But my favourite moment was the Scots coming to their senses and voting no to independence - I can still get my hands on as much oil and malt whisky as necessary.